The Silver Lining

As I was driving through the crazy traffic yesterday in and around Charleston, I was making a list in my head ( I do this constantly- in my head, on the little post it notes I have on my computer, all over my desk at school and in my kitchen) of all the things I needed to get done. My list is never-ending and always growing. And with my self-diagnosed ADD it sometimes makes it difficult to finish anything I start on my list because as soon as I start something, I remember I needed to do something else, hence the never-ending part.

Of course, I begin marking off the easy things on my list first: drop off the clothes I no longer wear to Goodwill, return the movies to Blockbuster, buy some cheap ornaments for a wreath that I'm going to make, etc. Leaving the more tedious and annoying things to do for later: clean the house, fold and put away laundry ( this is an entirely seperate job from cleaning the house. I can clean around laundry and leave it for days. As I sit hear blogging, I have clothes needing to be folded and put away before friends get here later this afternoon.), go to the grocery store, plan for my cooking extravaganza, worry about and do lesson plans for Monday (My school is being visited by Palmetto's Finest judges for an award, which means everything has to be perfect), and begin brainstorming and buying Christmas presents for friends and family members.

I become stressed and worried about getting everything done. I complain to myself about having too much to do and at that point I stop. All of these things I need to do I really should be thankful for. More often than I care to admit, I find myself complaining about these things that I'm blessed to have to do. I am thankful for my house that needs to be cleaned. It may be a pain in the butt to do, but I could be living in a car or in a shelter. I'm thankful I have the money to buy groceries and clothes. I may not have tons of it, but what I have gets the job done. I HAVE A JOB. So many people right can't say that. It may drive me crazy, but I have a job that, yes, I do love. It teaches me patience, the satisfaction of seeing the fruits of my labor, and how a parent can successfully raise a child. And finally, I'm lucky to have friends and family that I love, care for, and want to show them.

Lately, I've realized that I whine and complain about stupid, insignificant things. Things that in the grand scheme of things don't matter much. I recently had a friend whose mother passed away after a 2 year battle with cancer. She was such an amazing woman who did so much for her family, never complaining once. Her daughter, one of my best friends, has grown so much during this difficult time. She's become the one in the family everyone counts on. She took over the part her mother played- the rock of the family. When thinking about what she and her family are going through, my problems become small and unimportant. I've always had problems worrying about everything, trying to keep in perspective what is really important. This past week I've done a lot of self-reflection and decided to look at things in a different way. I'm lucky for the many blessings God has put in my life. I should be thankful for all of my "problems" and look for the silver lining in all of them- because there always is one.

I hope everyone has a very wonderful Thanksgiving- back to the kitchen for me, breaks over!!

Happy Halloween!

We are enjoying a nice and relaxing evening at home. I could not talk Austin into going out because their was "too much good football on". So I dressed up and handed out candy. We had about 8 trick or treaters...which was 8 more than last year. Our neighborhood has either really young couples (a few having kids) or really old people. I was hell bent on getting a picture of our "family". Poor Connery was not having it. I had to chase him all over the house like we do when he's about to get a bath. After much hissing, he sat nicely beside our pumpkin. Too bad we didn't have anyone that could take our picture so Aust and I could be in one together...oh well!

Hope everyone had a safe and happy Halloween! With Clemson whipping CC and Carolina losing to UT, this is shaping up to be a wonderful evening!! :-)

chill pill

Or maybe some prozac! I don't know what has been up with me lately, but I have been majorly stressed out. Nevermind that, I know exactly what has been up with me...I just need to learn to let things go. As soon as I leave that parking lot in the afternoon, I have to push all things school out of my mind- no matter what it may be. I left my report cards sitting on my desk rather than in my administrators box- oh well. I have a parent that sent me a note correcting something I messed up on their child's paper- oh well ( It's not like she won't still have a 99 average!). My kids can't measure for crap- oh well!!

I've come to realize, thanks to my wonderfully supportive, yet sometimes brutally honest husband, that I've been a beast to live with the past two weeks (and probably longer!). I haven't come home with anything nice to say and hardly have cracked a smile. Certainly not the person I like to be. I may not like the way things are going at school. I may want to make a change after this May, but I need to make a decision to change the way I look at things right now so I don't make my life and my husbands life horrible for the rest of the year.

I'm only one person and can only do so much. No need to waste my extra time worrying about things I can't control.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can;and wisdom to know the difference.

"I don't appreciate..."

These three words are some of the worst words a teacher can hear coming from a parent. Immediately, it lets me know that they are upset with something I have done and they are going to let me catch hell from them. This also makes any kind of contact or meeting with this parent basically uncomfortable from then on.

Most of the time the parent using this phrase is upset because their angel child has done something wrong that I am informing them about. This is a wonderful way to deflect the problem at hand and turn anything else into my fault. When their child kicks someone or knees another student in the butt while they are drinking from the water fountain, it only makes sense to say to the teacher, "I don't appreciate you not letting me know this has happened before." Apparently they forgot the infraction sheet they signed a couple weeks ago with a similar behavior. So glad I've kept that on file. :-)

Maybe she should come in and watch me with my class. I might be able to win her over. She might realize that she should appreciate me being consistent with her child and his behavior. Or appreciate me giving him praise or a pat on the back when he makes a good decision. Appreciate the patience I have with him when he veers from the correct path. Or the high expectations I have for him because he has great potential. What about the hug I give him as he leaves my room for the day? Or the hours I spend weekly, preparing what I do in class, coming up with fun activities and different ways to teach the same old standards so his butt will be ready for third grade. I guess those things don't need to be appreciated- probably because that's what I'm expected to do.

If only I ran the world and could tell parents what I really think, because I would then say back, "I don't appreciate you letting your child stay up until 10 o'clock and come dragging into my room late, without breakfast and tired this morning. I don't appreciate you initialing his homework messenger letting me know he's completed his homework, when in fact he didn't. I don't appreciate you modeling a bad attitude, where he thinks he can treat others badly and defy anyone in charge. I don't appreciate you sending him into school with a head full of adult lice running all over his scalp."

Too bad I don't run the world and I can't say those things. I guess it's because that's what PARENTS are EXPECTED to do.

And I appreciate those who do it!

New York City

I've never been to NYC and Austin has always promised that he would take me. There have been talks about us going previously, but nothing has ever panned out. He says we might go this Christmas, which would be an amazing time to go...the lights, the decorations, the weather...Normally I would hate the weather and wish I could only go in fall or spring. However, I was just watching something filmed in NYC (Yes, it is the trashy tv show Gossip Girl-if you read my earlier post, you know!).It made me want to go to NYC during the winter so badly. How wonderful would it be to walk in Central Park as the first few flakes were falling! I think we need to have a picture of the snow falling in our hair somewhere in famous NYC...just a thought!! :-)

Trashy TV

There is just something about horrible, terrible, trashy tv that I LOVE! Austin and I have this tradition (I'm stuck on trying to make traditions that he and I can call our own) of watching any stupid tv shows on VH1 and MTV. I don't know if it's the plot lines or the horrible characters in ALL of them that I love!!.
There is one show, however, that I do not watch with Aust. Gossip Girl is a dirtier version of 90210 that I could have ever hoped for. And Austin refuses to watch it with me. I don't ever catch it on tv, because we're always watching other trashy shows at the same time its on. So I always watch the DVD's when it comes out.
I've just rented disc 6 and 7 of season 2 tonight. I can't help but sit through all of them nonstop. OHHHHHHHHHH it's so addicting. I'll be finishing season 2 tomorrow. I certainly don't have ADD- I can sit through hours of tv. :-)

How Cute!

Two of our friends, Jessica and Bri, dropped by one night this week with this adorable cupcake they found at Harris Teeter! When they saw all the tiger paws of course they thought of us, I mean I do live with Mr. Clemson. I had to snap a quick picture before Austin devoured it! Thanks girls! :-)